Letting Go, Coming Home:
A Daylong Retreat with Cara Lai & nico hase
Saturday, March 7th
10 am to 4 pm pacific time
What if freedom isn't about having more, but needing less?
Nekkhama parami—renunciation or letting go—sounds like deprivation to our consumer culture. But true renunciation is actually the most radical form of abundance: the discovery that you already have everything you need.
This doesn't mean becoming a hermit or giving away all your possessions (though it might). It means loosening the grip of craving, the endless hunger that tells us we're not enough, we don't have enough, we haven't done enough.
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In this one-day online retreat, Cara & nico will explore nekkhama parami in depth—the profound freedom that comes through letting go.
The day will begin with an hour of conversation and an opening talk around the theme. We'll then sit and walk for four hours in lightly guided practice, before reconvening for a closing talk and further dialogue.
"Cara Lai is awesome. She is humble and real and willing to explore a heated topic without having any easy prepared answers." — Tasha Schumann and Jeff Warren, The Mind Bod Adventure Pod
"nico is a deeply experienced practitioner, with a strong dedication to his meditation journey. He has immersed himself for many years in long intensive practice, and I highly recommend his teaching." — Joseph Goldstein, Author of Mindfulness: A Practical Guide to Awakening, Co-founder of the Insight Meditation Society
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A Full Path of Practice—Rooted in Community
This daylong is the third in our 2026 series of ten online daylong retreats on the paramis hosted by Refuge of Belonging, a community rooted in dharma, built on shared presence and open to anyone curious about inner transformation. Daily Dharma Community: Join our WhatsApp conversation - open to all, whether you attend retreats or not. The conversation continues year-round with ongoing daylongs, weekly talks, quarterly classes, and community practice.
The ten paramis ("furtherances" or "completions") are foundational to the Buddhist path of awakening. Spanning states of the heart from kindness and equanimity to resolve and renunciation, they offer us a time tested way forward, a manner of cultivating what most truly benefits ourselves and others, both right now, in this moment, and as a stepping stone to final liberation.
Registration & Payment
Please use the button below to register. We offer these daylong retreats on a dana model. The suggested donation is $50 to $150 per session. We gratefully accept contributions of greater or lesser amounts, based on your resources.
Early registration is appreciated - it helps us prepare materials and create the best possible experience.
After registration, you will receive a confirmation email from Rachael Tanner-Smith, our retreat manager, that includes the daylong schedule and the zoom link. A day before the event, you will receive a reminder email with the zoom link again.
Looking forward to seeing you there.
Cara Lai has spent most of her life in pursuit of meaning and happiness, which landed her on a cushion for much of her adult life. Throughout many mind-body adventures including many long-term retreats, she has explored the concentrated mind, chronic illness, the value of pleasure, the power of maternal energy, and connection to the earth. In the past, Cara has worked as an artist, wilderness guide, social worker and psychotherapist. Now she finds herself intently focused on the dharma path, practicing both on and off the cushion in unconventional ways, and using intuition as her guide. She tries her best to teach from the most authentic and vulnerable place she can muster, and is still learning about the contentment of simply existing.
nico hase lived in a monastery for six years before earning a PhD in counseling psychology and becoming an Insight Meditation teacher full time. He currently mentors mindfulness teachers, teaches online and in-person retreats, and speaks with students in one-on-one sessions. He and his beloved life partner devon are the authors of How Not to Be a Hot Mess: A Buddhist Survival Guide for Modern Life.
